being a mom (feelings of a 3 month mom)

what is it about being a mom that just seems to satisfy my innermost being? Is it the organization? The satisfaction of completing daily tasks? Is it a hand written grocery list or a well equipped beach bag? Is it holding something in my arms? Is it the end of another day, knowing I am loved? I don't know, but there is something about being able to stare into the eyes of another and see yourself and liking what you see. There is something about a huge smile, just for you. Or a warm head on your heart. It is words and thoughts and feelings and so much more. It is the feeling of a piece of me being outside of my body where I can touch it and see it and feel it. It is the end of a long day. The whimpers during sleep. The immediate, innate reaction to his every need. The feeling of giving with no expectation. Perhaps it is without a doubt what women were equipped to do, so all that love that is so much a part of us has somewhere to go. All I know is that William Joseph is a part of me. A part that I can't exactly explain or even understand, but am so happy to have. When he looks at me, I sware he is seeing so much more than what meets the eye, so much more than what anyone else can see. There is no judgement, there need be no conversation. I am so blessed to have received him. He is so wonderful and perfect. I just can't get enough. He is so much happiness. Pure and true. His little warm body and soft, white skin, in my arms... It is like laying on a cloud. It is pure heaven. I can't even explain it. I just know that I have to try. I have to try to express and put together what I feel, because that makes it all real. That means it really happened. It's not just this beautiful dream that happened to me one night. It was as real as you and me. I thought I had known happiness before William was born. I know what it is like to love and adore things. I love flowers, I admire them every chance I get. I love to smell them and observe them in their bursts of color. I thought I had never seen something as beautiful as a flower. And then came my William. The prettiest flower of all. He is like a bud emerging every day. The feelings that I have to protect him and just hold in my arms forever... they are something serious. It can be a bit overwhelming at times, but it is a part of me just like he is. I love him and he will forever be my tu me manques.